Friday, August 19, 2022

ANS -- And now for something completely different: Car Talk credits

Did you ever listen to the radio program "Car Talk"?  Here's the full credits.  Some are puns, others are just jokes. I think.  Enjoy.
--Kim


Staff credits

 

Car Talk Credits

 

The Conclusive, Definitive, Official Dewey, Cheetham & Howe Staff List

It takes this many people to produce such a lousy show? Who knew!

Despite our huge payroll, we're always on the look out for new staff members. So, if you know of someone who may be worthy to join our sordid collection of staff, send his name and position to the Car Talk Plaza Personnel Department now. Thanks!

 

Car Talk's Recently Hired Staff

 

British Hospitality AdvisorTina Crumpet
Customer Service SpecialistBegonia Payne-Diaz
Director of Cosmetic SurgeryZbigniew Kuptz
Plumber's Crack ApologistLucy Lastic
Obsessive Yard Care SpecialistMoses Lonergan
Ornithology InternLuke A. Boyd
Sculling CoachRose Dior
Work and Leisure Time CoachKay Keneetit

 

Car Talk's Official Staff Credits

 
401K Statement AnalystsDouse and Burnham
Accounts Payable AdministratorImelda Czechs
Aegean CatererSue Flockey
Accounts Payable Clerk, Moscow OfficeDasha Chekhov
Accounts Receivable Supervisor from the Mumbai OfficeVishnu Payup
Adopted Son from SwedenBjorn A. Payne Diaz
Airline Seat TesterWilma Butfit
Air-Quality MonitorCarmine Dioxide
Air Traffic ControllerUlanda U. Lucky
Airline Reservation ManagerWill Price Randomly
Alaskan Prenuptial AdvisorRush Inuit
Alignment InspectorLou Segusi
Alternative Fuel ConsultantAmanda Livering Cole
Anger Management CoachKirsten Hollered
Anger Management ConsultantJoanne Slowburner
Animal Control OfficerTurner Luce
Appalachian ChefEverett Possum
Appeals SpecialistBud Uronner
Appetizer CoordinatorBarbara Ganush
Appointment SecretaryStu Earley
Appointment Secretary IIAmadeus O. Early
Arbitration ExpertViola Fuss
Art CriticPhyllis Steen
Art Critic IIDot Snice
Asphalt ContractorLuciano Pavearoadi
Assertiveness Training CoachLois Steem
Assistant Customer Care RepresentativeKurt Reply
Asst. Directors of Computer ServicesSy Burnett and Sy Quest
Assistant Director of Moral SupportHugo Gurll
Assistant to our Make Up ArtistGladys Radio
Assistant Director of Strategic PlanningKent C. Detrees
Assistant DisciplinarianJoaquin D'Planque
Asst. Fleet ManagerLisa Carr
Assistant to the PR SpecialistLotta B. Essen
Asst. Transportation CoordinatorOrson Buggy
Astroturf InstallerNomar Wheaton
Attorney GeneralJanet Torino
Attorney General in charge of
Tobacco Settlements
Hubert H. Humvee II
Audience CounterHugh Wake
Audience EstimatorAdam Illion
Audience Response AnalystLuke Warm
Australian Tour GuideJoaquin Matilda
Auto-Body ExpertJames Bondo
Automotive Finishes ConsultantRusty Steele
Automotive Medical ResearcherDr. Denton Fender
Automotive RegistrarMegan Model
Auto Seat TesterFitz Matush
Back Seat DriverVeronica Lizzioncourse
Back Seat Driver IIMischa Turnov
Bad Joke InterpreterNadia Geddit
Bail Bond ProviderFreida Gogh
Bail-BondswomanFrieda Wander
Band LeaderSasha Noyes
Banker, Car Talk Plaza Poker GamesNikolai Putin
Bathroom Tile InstallerLotta Bullnose
Bean CounterEd Amame
Bedtime StorytellerJuan Zapata
Behavior ConsultantWyatt B. Hoovesia
Biblical ScholarVera Lee Isay
Big Band LeaderJuan Anatou
Blues CoordinatorMahamadan Ptolemy
Bob Dylan SpecialistI. Shelby Released
Bolt TightenerTilda Plierslip
Book CriticOdessa Paige Turner
Boston Funeral DirectorHadley Newham
Bowling CoachMenachem Down
Brake AdjusterSchlomo Quigley
Breathalyzer AdministratorEureka Garlic
British Cutlery SpecialistSir Irving Spoon
British DoormanIsaiah Olchap
Broadway ReviewersIke and Stan Musicals
Brother in the MilitaryMajor Payne-Diaz
Boston Traffic DirectorLaura Biden
Budget DirectorSasha Titus
Bungee Jumping InstructorHugo First
Butler in Car Talk's Scotland DivisionAngus MacCoatup
Broadcast PhilosopherPhillip Airtime
Business ForecasterLuigi Bord
Cabinet MakerL. Ron Cupboard
Caffeine Addiction CounselorBruno Moore
Car Stereo InstallerCarlos Antenna
Car Talk BouncerEuripedes Ibreakayourface
Car Talk Ice Rink ManagerSam Boney
Car Talk Opera CriticBarbara Seville
Celebrity ConsultantsRichard Gere-Oil, Mick Jaguar
Chairman, Federal Lubrication BoardAlan Greasepan
Chairman, Joint Chiefs of StaffJohn Shall-I-Pop-a-Wheelie
Chairman, Math Dept.Horatio Algebra
Chairman of our Southern Literature DepartmentAmos Reid
Chairman, Oral History Dept.Ira Caull
Chairman, Staff Physics Dept.Victor Analysis
Chairman, Underemployment Study GroupArt Majors
Chicken Soup ProvisionerKent Hoyt
Chief AccountantCandace B. Rittenoff
Chief BenefactorMyra Chunkle
Chief Cook and Bottle WasherChef Boyar Ubusy
Chief EstimatorEdward James Almost
Chief Information OfficerOtto Delupe
Chief JusticeHarry Mental, aka Judge Mental
Chief Legal CounselHugh Louis Dewey of Dewey, Cheetham & Howe
Chief NegotiatorBernadette Bridge
Chief of Stadium Seating for the OlympicsWayne Back
Chief ProcrastinatorJuan Menudo
Chief Procrastinator, Paris OfficeJacques Hughes
Chief Procurement OfficerEmma Chizzit
Chief of Tire TechnologyYessir Itsaflat
Child Care ProviderA. Hugh Nokitov
Child Development ExpertDr. Benjamin Spark
Child Transportation SpecialistMinnie Van Driver
Children's Menu AdviserBea Ferrone
Children's Music ProgrammerAl Lowetta
Children's Sleepover CoordinatorAmos Muhmahmi
Cigar Smoke MonitorAnna Paulina Roma
Class Attendance MonitorJulie Verley
Class ValedictorianSidney Furst Rowe
Cleanliness InspectorAdolph Deflor
Cliché MonitorSaul Wellingood
Climate Change MonitorJillian Here
Clock WatcherColette O'Day
Clothing DesignerHugh Jass
Co-Chairmen of Apathy Study GroupBen Thayer, Don Thatt
Coffee Break ManagerCarmella Highwater
Collections SpecialistColin Duboise
Collision Repair SpecialistJesse "The Body Shop" Ventura
Commencement SpeakerGladys Overwith
Communications DirectorGeorge Stayontopothis
Communications Director IINoam Sayin
Communications Specialist, Rome OfficeKay C. Deech
Compassion CoordinatorOphelia Paine
Complaint Line OperatorXavier Breath
Complaint Line Operator IILevon Hold
Complaint Resolution SpecialistBilly Aiken
Computer Hardware SpecialistC. Colin Backslash
Computer InstructorC. Boynton Glick
Conductor Emeritus, Tappet Brothers Symphony OrchestraSludgy Ozawa
Conductor, Tappet Brothers Symphony OrchestraPhilip Harmonic
Conflict Resolution SpecialistHugo Origo
Conflict Resolution SpecialistYvonne Apeesamey
Congressional LobbyistsOrrin Hatchback, Dan Rustencarski, Paul Simonize, B. F. Gingrich
Conservative Political CommentatorEileen Tudor-Wright
Conspiracy TheoristNadia Belimi
Construction ManagerDustin Dubree
Contract Extension NegotiatorEvan Elpus
Coordinator, 12-Step Recovery ProgramCody Pendant
Coordinator of Summer Visits to the InlawsDon Juan-Gogh
Copyright AttorneyPat Pending
Corporate SpokespersonHugh Lyon Sack
Crash TesterHope Anna Prayer
Creative DirectorDrew A. Blank
Credit CounselorMax Stout
Criminal Justice ExpertLauren Order
Cruise Activity PlannerEton Doolittle
Curator of Dionne Warwick StudiesIsiah Lilprair
Curator of our French Armaments ExhibitBrittany Spears
Curator of Tom's Car CollectionRex Galore
Customer Car Care RepresentativeHaywood Jabuzoff
Customer Car Care Representative AssistantDot Stubadd
Customer Credit OfficerNoah Wayne Hellman
Customer GreeterMel Pugh
Day Old Seafood ChefAmelia Loos
Daylight Savings Time ManagerKonrad Adenauer
Customer Service Representative from London OfficeSir Leo Mann
Defense AttorneyJustin Volk V
Defense Attorney IIHeronimus B. Blind
Defense Attorney IIIDonnatella Dicoppas
Defense Attorney IVGil T. Azell
Defense Dept. ConsultantMajor Error
Dental HygienistGinger Vitis
Dermatologist for TeenagersDon Pickett
Desi Arnaz BiographerIke Arumba
Dessert ChefTyra Meesu
Dessert Menu PlannerEaton Flanagan
Director of Accounts PayableBill Shredder
Director of Allergy ResearchTheresa Pollinating
Director of Alpine ChoirO. Leo Lahey
Director of Automotive SecurityBoris Karlarm
Director, Automotive Recycling Center
(aka Junkyard)
Ricardo Dismantleban
Director of Cadillac SteeringToulouse Toutrack
Director of The Car Talk Psychic NetworkLa Toyota Jackson
Designer of Casual Clothing LineNoh Tie, Woo!
Director of CateringRussell Upsumgrub
Director of Clandestine MeetingsRon DesVue
Director of Cold Weather StartingMartina Neverturnover
Director of Computer DiagnosticsGus O'Genn
Director of Computer ServicesDot Matrix
Director of Congressional FundingFred Knott
Director of Country MusicStan Beyerman
Director of Deep Sea ResearchMarianna Trench
Director of Delicate Electronics RepairAnita Hammer
Director of Desert Food SuppliesSandy Berger
Director of Elder AffairsAl Takaka
Director of E-mail ResponsesPeggy Flaming
Director of Employee Loyalty ProgramUpton Leftus
Director of Ethics & HonestyU. Lyon Sack
Director of Firestone Tire RecallsIvana Michelin
Director of Gender StudiesAmanda B. Reckondwyth
Director of Global WarmingNomar Winter
Director of Grad Student TransportationIona Heap
Director of Guaranteed Repeat BusinessLucinda Boltz
Director of High-Speed Impact StudiesRicardo Montana-Bahn
Director of Italian Traffic EnforcementNoah U. Turna
Director of Intensive Care Unit
(The Picabo ICU)
Picabo Street
Director of Jamaican Baseball OperationsReggae Jackson
Director of Japanese Cooling SystemsEmperor Overhito
Director of Latin American Shameless CommerceChico Maniorda
Director of Listener SupportNoah Fundrive
Director of LubricationOlive Presser
Director of Luxury Car HornsToney Blare
Director of Long-Range Strategic PlanningKay Sera
Director of Monopoly PolicyJuan Moorehouse
Director of New Product RepairWarren T. Mifutt
Director of Nutritional SupplementsRose Hips
Director of Pavlovian ResearchIsabelle Ringing
Director of Pedestrian OperationsCarless Castenada
Director of PhotographyLen Scapon
Director of Positive ReinforcementA. Kurt Nod
Director of Pollution ControlMaury Missions
Director of Preventive MaintenanceOscar Ruitt
Director of PurchasingLois Bidder
Director of Puzzler Answer Luxury Gift ReceptionDonatella Debois
Directors of Quality ControlLes Thomas and Nomar Raymond
Director of Quality Control IIEamon Lowe
Director of Red Sox Themed UpholsteryNomar Car-seat-repairer
Director of Roadway ResurfacingSylvia Pottholi
Director of Russian Rust ProtectionYevgeny Primercoat
Director of Speed BumpsSlow-Me-Down Milosevic
Director of Sports InformationLinus Scrimmage
Director of Staff BonusesHolly Unlikely
Director of Staff Bonuses IIRay Vaughn
Director of Staff Pay IncreasesXavier Breath (assisted by Tony Von Thinkett!)
Director of Standard TimeRed Auerbach
Director of Sycophantic ActivitiesEileen Yorway
Director of Three Stooges StudiesLee Eyeapoka
Director of Top Secret StrategyDonatello Nobatti
Director of Unsolicited AdviceH. Ross Peugeot
Director of Upward Mobility
in Eastern Europe
Zbigniew Chrysler
Director of VengeanceEwell Rudy Day
Director of Warm-Weather ProgrammingSumner Reruns
Director of Year-End BonusesHolly Unlikely
DisciplinarianDon Fuller Round
Disgruntled Massage TherapistOphelia Self
Distant Cousin in Mexico CityJaime Royal Payne Diaz
Divorce AttorneyCarmine Nottyors
Document Security Expert from JamaicaEuripedes Upmann
Dog TrainerDon Chase Katz
Door-to-Door SalesAnnie Von Holm
Dope Slap AdministratorThad Hertz
Dougie's Live-in Fashion Improvement CoachNoah Vale
Downsizing ConsultantCandace Guy
Drug Trials SpecialistPlacebo Domingo
DrycleanerPreston Creases
Dyslexic Rock and Roll Music CriticRoland Rock
Early American Folk Music SpecialistConstance R. Rowe
East Asian Used Car ExpertAlexander Soldyernissan
Ebay SpecialistSelma Junkoff
Electronics TechnicianSammy Conductor
Elocution CoachRichard Shun (aka Dick)
Elvis ImpersonatorAmal Shookup
Emergency Humor Hotline OperatorJoe Klein
Emergency Preparedness DirectorRon Lykell
Emergency Room PhysicianHenrietta Badclam
Emissions TesterJustin Hale VII (I, II,III, IV, V, VI may they RIP)
Empathy CoachEnzo Watt
Employee Morale BoostersPhil Lacrap and his brother Luke Lacrap
Employee Orientation SpecialistTrudy Gauntlet
Employee Refrigerator MonitorCarmen Dating
Employee TerminatorLaura Deboom
Engine Cooling Systems ManagerJean Claude Air Damme
Evasive Driving InstructorVera Bruptly
Executive CoachRussell Papus
Executive Washroom AttendantEustace Stahl
Exercise GuruLiza Round
Exhaust Manifold SpecialistManny Burns
Express Oil Change ProviderJoaquin Joaquout
Fact CheckerElla Fynoe
Fact Checker, Mexico City OfficeC.S. Verdad
Fashion ConsultantNatalie Attired
Fashion Improvement CoachNoah Vale
Father-in-Law LiaisonRoyal Payne Diaz
Feng Shui Consultant in MumbaiRhea Rangit
Figure Skating CoachLandon McKeaster
Financial AdvisorsIllgott and Gaines
Financial ForecasterLou Gubrious
Fleet Maintenance ManagerRenata Oil
Fleet ManagerOscar de la Rental
Food TasterHoward M. Burgers
Footwear ConsultantSusan Shocks
401 K AdvisorHugh Don Wannano
French Automotive LiaisonMaurice Chevrolet
French Child Care CoordinatorGerard Diaperdoo
French DogwalkerPoupon Degrasse
French Folk Music HistorianJohn T. Alouetta
French Ford Expedition DriverHenri Rependent
French Vacation SpecialistApril Lynn Parris
Gambling Addiction CounselorAlthea Andrasia
Gas Tank WelderStan Beck
GastroenterologistCameron Diaz
Genetic Counselor in RomeDonna Maria Eucuzzin
German InterpreterAxel Hausen
Golf and Wine CorrespondentLitre Vino
Golf ProPutnam Daily
Gospel Choir DirectorColin Response
Graduation CoordinatorsVal and Dick Torian
Grammar ConsultantI.M. Shirley Wright
Greek Driving InstructorAdjustes Miros
Greek Insurance EstimatorCosta Grand
Guest AccommodationsThe Horseshoe Road Inn
Guide to Rapid Sun TanningLes Block
Gum SurgeonPerry O'Dontal
HairI.M. Mr. Gigi
Hair Color ConsultantDewey R. Donti
Hair Restoration SpecialistHedda Harrigan
Head of AlterationsToulouse Toulong
Head of Bldgs. & GroundsMoe D'Lawn
Head of Covert OperationsDinah Tell
Head of Customer ServiceDawn Boddame
Head of Division of Threat AssessmentEwen Whadarmy
Head of Front Desk SecurityConstance Noring
Head of Personal SecurityC. Howie Run
Head of SecurityBarb Dwyer
Head of our Organ Donation ProgramOlivia McColon
Heads of Parts Dept.Al Lloyd Wheel, Constance Velocity
Head of Used Car PurchasingEwell B. Hoffinett
Head of Watersports MarketingSelma Kayak
Head of Working Mother Support GroupErasmus B. Dragon
Help Desk CoordinatorDan Difino
Help Desk SupervisorReed Emanuel Pal
Help Line CoordinatorsKara Lott-Knott, Don Bothermy
Holiday Decoration SpecialistAretha Holley
Holiday Wardrobe ConsultantDon Weenau
Horsepower ConsultantMr. Ed
Hospitality DirectorDoris Shutt
In-house Literary CriticAl Ligori
In-law Hospitality ProviderEmile Endicott
Insurance AgentHeidi Ductible
Interior DecoratorPerry Winkle
Interpretive Dance InstructorTristan Schaut
Inventory ManagerMandalit Del Bar-Code
Iraqi Sales DirectorAziz Nowarranty
Italian Conflict Resolution SpecialistsHugh and Mia Donnagria
Italian GovernessDonna Day Evvalurn
International Lubrication ExpertsC.V. Boutros Boutros Gali and Fidel Castrol
IQ EvaluatorLois Tess Gore
Janis Joplin BiographerIan Bobby McGee
Japanese ChefBenny Honda
Jazz Music CoordinatorBertha Deblues
Jeep DriverJocelyn De Contents
Jewelry AppraiserGolda Myear
Jewelry Appraiser IIMehta Feingold
Jump Starting ExpertStan Wellback
Keeper of Bell Tower(Hatchback of Notre Dame) Quasi Automotive
Laptop Repair SpecialistEustace Hammer
Latin American Bullfighting SpecialistGordon Diaz
Latin American Trade RepresentativeNoah Comprenday
Layoff CounselorHarry Verderchi
Lay Off Counselor IIOscar Lavista
Leader of The Former Peugeot Dealers of America Support GroupEustace L. Emmons
Leo Tolstoy biographer: Warren PeaceAuthor of Leo Tolstoy by Warren Peace
Liaison to the British IslesIsaiah Oldchap
Liaison to the Space ProgramRoger Houston
Liaison Officer to Volvo & RenaultBjorne Toulouse
Libel Defense Director in TokyoSosumi Areti
Lighting ExpertShanda Lear
Literary CriticsErnest & Julio Hemingway
Little Dog of Payne-Diaz familyToto Payne Diaz
Loan OfficerI.O. Silver
Local News ReporterPhil Mataleven
LocksmithErnest & Eustace Nailfile
Long Distance Cycling EnthusiastMajor Ashburn
Long-Distance Truck DriverEtienne Wheeler
Long Range Economic PlannerDarren D. Headlights
Loss Prevention AssociateNatasha D'Merchandise
Lost Luggage TrackerLester Carey
Lottery Ticket CoordinatorJason Rainbows
Lug Nut SpecialistTad Tolouse
Luncheon ChefHannah Mia Cannatunna
Luxury Accomomdations ProviderTony Diggs
MailmanAlfredo De-Daschund
Manager of Automotive AccessoriesFrancis Ford Cupholda
Manager of Car Talk
Capital Depreciation Fund
Les Ismore
Manager of Cartalk.ComCy Burnett
Manager, Car Talk Listeners Rebate ProgramWendy Pigsfly
Manager, Donkey Based Video EquipmentCameron Diaz
Manager of Employee RefrigeratorCarmen Dating
Manager of the Weekly Shrimp BuffetSheldon Deveigned
Marine BiologistFrieda Wales
Marine ForecasterWindsor Calm
Marriage CounselorMarion Haste
Martial Arts TrainerAnita Degroin
Mechanic's AssistantHannah Twomey
Missing Persons Investigator, from the Tel Aviv officeYehuda Guy
Montana Traffic Law DirectorHugh Jim Bissell
Mortgage Loan ConsultantNora Lenderbee
Mother-in-Law LiaisonStella Payne Diaz
Motivational SpeakerBoris Oxoff
Moving Van DriverCarrie Desofa
Museum GuideDesdamona Lisa
Music DirectorMel F. Lewis
Musical DirectorDonna E. Mobile
Musical Theater Critic from the Bombay OfficeJaswant Singh
Natural History CuratorWillie Mammoth
New-Employee Training ProgramEwell Flounder
New York-based Dispute Settlement CoordinatorHugh Talkinamee
Nomadic StudiesRoman Hunt
Nutrition ConsultantsEaton Wright and Liven Good
New Truck ReviewerZbigniew Rigg
Night Club ManagerDon Kashane
Wine SnobNoah Merle Low
Official Football WidowEliza Decouch
Office Ice Cream TasterNora Morse
Official SpokespersonHowie Vasive
Official SpokespersonLou Scannon
Ornithologist in TrainingLuke A. Boyd
Our Chief NegotiatorNicole Anne Dime
Our DNA ResearcherGene Hackman
Overnight Bus DriverBorden Drousy
Overseer of Florida Voting PracticesEmmanuel Recount
Parking AttendantRick O'Shea
Parking Garage AttendantRay Zador
Parking Lot AttendantKent Stirwell
Parole OfficerWilly Bolt
Parts Inventory ManagerWayne Debach
Pastry ChefEdith Tu
Pastry Chef IIBuck Le Vaugh
Paternity Suit ResearcherOren Jewison
Pedestrian AdvocateJay Walker
Pension Fund ManagerDot Comstock
PeriodontistWinston Paine
Personal Hygiene Advisor from the Tokyo OfficeOh Takashawa
Personal Makeup ArtistBud Tuggli
Personal TrainerJim Shortz
Personal Trainer IIEuripides Abs
Pet Shop Inventory ManagerArthur Katzenbach
Petty Cash AuditorDave Reckoning
PhilosopherWanda Y. Datso
PhotographerF. Stop Fitzgerald
Physical TherapistEustace Kane
Physical TherapistEstelle Hoyts
Physics Graduate StudentLaura Vernersha
Pitching CoachOwen Too
Plastic SurgeonFay Slift
Podcast ReviewerKent Stan de Noyes
Poet LaureateRobert Defrost
Poker CoachAlthea Andrasia
Political ConsultantMark Iavelli
Political Consultant IIPaul C. Wonk
Ponzi Scheme OperatorShirley W. Money
PowerPoint ProducerBoris Tadeff
PR DirectorBea Esser
Practical Joke EvaluatorOdessa Goodwyn
Practical Joke SpecialistDietrich Iznotulaff
Prayer CoachDenise Hurt
Pre-show CaterersGiardia Brothers
President, Car Talk Hair Club for MenEmerson Fittibaldie (he's also a client)
President, Disgruntled Hatchback Owners ClubIvana Trunk
Press SecretaryDon B. Zonozi
Producer's Office, Furnished byRick Kleiner
Proof ReaderErin Spelling
Proprietor of Car Talk's men clothing storeEuripedes Eumenedes
Prosecuting AttorneyMelissa Forethought
Pseudonym ConsultantNorm De Plume
Public Opinion PollsterPaul Murky of Murky Research
Puerto Vallarta Transmission SpecialistSynchro de Mayo
Public Appearances CoordinatorIda Klein
Puzzler TesterOtis S. Hard
Race Team DriverAndy Zoff
Rafting GuideEuphrates Rapids
Ranch ForemanHyman Oldcowhand
Ratings Analysis SpecialistRita Menweip
Recently Discovered Uncle from WarsawZbigniew Payne Diaz
ReceptionistSedona Tush
Receptionist IILevon Hold
Regional Director, AtlantaFrank Lee Scarlett
Registered Mail ManagerKent B. Goode
Reincarnation ExpertDiana Comeback
Reluctant Film EditorFrancis Ford Cupholda
Rental Property ManagerUlysses Up
Rental Property ManagerCondoleeza B. Broken
Repair Cost ConsultantBill M. Moore
Repo AgentCarmine Now
Restroom AttendantsTrudy Door & Donna Hall
Retirement Party PlannerLuisa Jolley Goodfellow
Retractable Antenna TesterBenton Broke
Rock and Roll HistorianBruce Wade Hughes
Rocket ScientistChet Propeld
Rollerblading InstructorLandon McKeester
Roman History BuffVinnie V. Divici
Route PlannerOliver D. Map
Rumanian Emissions TesterVlad the Inhaler
Russian-American Hesitation SpecialistAnita Putin Newkarb
Russian ChauffeurPicov Andropov
Russian Gas Station AttendantPhillip Antopitov
Russian InternIgor Beaver
Russian Vacation SpecialistIvana Veekoff
Safari PlannerSarah Anne Getty
Safety OfficersMort & Fay Tality
Sales DirectorAziz Nowarranty
Sales Motivation CoachNorman Vincent Pealeout
Satellite Radio CriticCandace B. Sirius
Scout LeaderLawson D. Woods
Seafood ProvisionerHoward E. Oysters
Seasonal Adjustment Disorder SpecialistMahmoud S. Bleak
Seat Cushion TesterMike Easter
Seating ConsultantRush Lumbar
Second Shift MeteorologistClaudio Vernight
Secretary of Pain ReliefLes Aspirin
Secretary of Halogen HeadlampsMade-A-Lane Allbright
Secretary of Photographic ReproductionFresh Prince
Self Defense InstructorNina Cahones
Self Esteem CoachMia Culpa
Senior Accountant from the Paris OfficeCount De Monet
Senior Citizen Driving InstructorTonya Blinkeroff
Senior OrnithologistSeymour Robbiins
Sensitive Language AdvisorHolly Schmidt
Set Theorist from the Stockholm OfficeSven Diagram
Sexual Harassment CounselorNatasha Diaz
Sexual Harassment Intervention CounselorPat McCann
Sexual Harassment Trainer, Frankfurt OfficeHans T. Josef
Shop ForemanLuke Bizzy
Shop Foreman IIConstance Ubervision
Short Order CookBurt Toast
Show ReviewerSeamus O'Dull
Sidewalk Clothing VendorChip Pentz
Singing UrologistUrethra Franklin
Sleep Clinic OperatorBetty Bayh
Sleepy LaBeef TicketProcurer Caldwell Ahead
Snowboarding InstructorSoren Dekeester
Solicitor of New IdeasObie Quiet
SoloistsKerry Oki, Victor Yugo
Spanish GerontologistSenor Moment
Special Liaison to the California Energy CommissionTanya Lightov
Speech PathologistPeter Aftermey
SpeechwriterAudrey Marx
Spiritual CounselorMiss Dolly Lama
Spiritual CounselorsZeke and Ewell Find
Sportsmanship CoachIvan Youlose
Staff Activities CoordinatorDewey Hafta
Staff AcupuncturistO. Howard Hertz
Staff AdvisorJudy Cyde
Staff AlpinistArianna Topyet
Staff ArchivistBernadette File
Staff AuthorFour-Door Dostoevski
Staff BarberBuzz Wazleftov
Staff Barber IILes Offenbach
Staff Bicycle TesterMaya Certz
Staff Bikini WaxerHarry Mouval
Staff Brown NoserEsther Iffick
Staff Butler, from the Car Talk
Bombay Division
Mahatma Coat
Staff BouncerEuripedes Ibrakauface
Staff Carburetor ExpertLeslie Stahl
Staff CardiologistAngie O'Plasty
Staff CartographersFrances N. Europe and Niles N. Africa
Staff Cat FeederKen Opener
Staff CatererEdith Ann Weepe
Staff ChaperoneTheresa Crowd
Staff ChaplainNeil Down
Staff Cheese ExpertGordon Zola
Staff Child Seat TesterDrew Lee Weiner
Staff ChiropractorWinston Paine
Staff ComposersGustav Muffler, Bela Cartok
Staff CooksAl Dente, Sal Monella
Staff Copy EditorAdeline Moore
Staff DermatologistIvan Offalitch
Staff DieticianNorma Lee Chowen
Staff DisciplinarianLes Stern
Staff Disciplinarian IITara Neuwon
Staff Disciplinarian IIIJuan Demerritt
Staff DramatistAnton Chokeov
Staff Fact CheckerNeera Nuff
Staff ForgerVera Similitude
Staff GastroenterologistDr. Louis Stuhls
Staff GeneticistDr. Jean Poole
Staff GeographerLorraine, Alsace
Staff GigoloSpencer Cash
Staff Gossip Columnist.Bud Inski
Staff Grief CounselorAriel Bummerman
Staff GroperManny Bumsfeldt
Staff HistorianMarsha Time
Staff InternLois Rung
Staff IntuitionistIvan Inkling
Staff Kitchen DesignerJoaquin Freezer
Staff KleptomaniacHeidi Silver
Staff LandscaperAlonzo Greene
Staff Martini MixerOliver Twist
Staff MediatorSue First
Staff Mediator IICollette Even
Staff MeteorologistGail Storm
Staff Meteorologist IIClaudio Vernight
Staff Meteorologist from New DelhiLuke Audavindo
Staff Meteorologist from the Seattle OfficeWayne Goaway
Staff Morale CoachDonna Karen E. Moore
Staff MorticiansBarry L. Plotz
Sven Didigo
Staff NaturalistDiedre Oppings
Staff NutritionistArlene Menu
Staff Oral HistorianStudds Tercel
Staff Ornithologist, McMurdo OfficeMarcia De Penguins
Staff OrthopedistDenise Hoyt
Staff PhilosopherRay Zondette
Staff PhysicistMoe Mentum
Staff PrestidigitatorO. Luke Adair
Staff Promotions DirectorAnita Buttkiss
Staff PsychologistLes Moody
Staff ReportersWalter Windshield, Walter Crankcase
Staff SommelierAvery Goodyear
Staff Snowplow DriverFrasier Tushov
Staff SupervisorMike Romanage
Staff Temporary Housing SpecialistCondo Leaser Rice
Staff UrologistWilla Catheter
Staff Urologist IIPete Shedille
Standard Time KeeperHans Auerbach
State Secrets KeeperLucinda Tung
Station Identification CoordinatorAvery Haffenauer
StatisticianMarge Innovera
Studio Repair TechnicianSloan Cranky
Summer InternGladys Overnow
Summer Wardrobe CoordinatorBermuda Schwartz
Sunscreen ProvisionerLes Brown
Suppliers of Insurance to
Dewey, Cheetham and Howe
C.F.I. Care
Surf ReporterCal Abunga
Surgeon GeneralC. Everett Koop DeVille
Swedish AttorneyBjorn Liar
Swedish PessimistGunnar D. Daysr
Swimwear DesignerC. Bigby Heinz
Swing Dance ConsultantAntonia Band-Era
Table Saw OperatorLes Digits
Taciturn PoetKurt Rhymer
TailorEuripedes Imenedes
Tax ConsultantLou Pole
Tax PreparerBernice Documents
Teenage DaughterSasha Royal Payne Dias
Teenage ValetLao Tse Parker
Telephone Complaint TakerOpal Lease
Telephone Solicitation Response SpecialistTeresa Noboddihoum
Telephone Solicitor, Paris OfficeHenri Lenting
Termite InspectorLuke Underwood
Timing DirectorBenjamin Not-Yet-You-Yahoo!
ToastmasterCy Gazunt
Tom's Beard CleanerEmile Initself
Tom's Personal Dating CoachEdna Bagg
Tommy's Ex House CleanerStu Grody
Tommy's Front Yard DesignerRoxanne Debris
Tom's Memory CoachHugh Sherlock Familia
Tom's Official Co-PilotYvette de Pants
Tom's Other Dating CoachAnnie Von Vildo
Tom's Personal Hygiene CoachHaseen Benisi
Tom's Personal MatchmakerRobin D'Craydell
Tour LeaderTerry Incognito
Town Car Rear Seat PassengerRalph Oliver
Town CriersNina Clark and
Alice Well
Traffic ReporterU.B. Crawlin
Train Derailment SpecialistToulouse La Track
TranscriberDiana Boredom
Transportation CoordinatorRick Shaw
Travel AgentLois Faire
Travel Agent, Bombay OfficeVishnu Verhere
Travel CoordinatorAlthea Around
Two Year OldAriel Payne Diaz
Undergarment InspectorI.C. London
Urgent Response CoordinatorCandace Waite
Used Car SalesmanAlexis Itznot
Used Car SalespersonMeg Meehan Hoffa
Vehicle Preservation SpecialistCosmo Lean
Videographer, Tel Aviv OfficeSchlomo Replay
Visually Impaired Parking Lot AttendantDale Neverknow
Wardrobe AdvisorLuke Howard Fitzhugh
Wardrobe Advisor IIHarley Fitzhugh
Wardrobe AssistantJoaquin Closet
Wardrobe ConsultantNatalie Attired
Warrantee Claim AdjudicatorCandace B. Rittenoff
Weekend Excursion PlannerDeepak Tumuch
Weight Loss CoachHugh Otto Dewitt
Werewolf Studies SpecialistHarriet Knight
Window DressersCurt and Rod
Windshield Wiper Replacement TeamIke and Zeke Leerly
Windsurfing InstructorEileen Windy
Wine Taster from the Abu Dhabi OfficeHassen Ben Sober
Women's Hockey TeamMiss Inga Tooth
Yodeling Instructor from HawaiiLeo Del Lahey Hy

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