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Exclusive: Brigham Young's Great-Great-Granddaughter on Mormonism and Mitt Romney
Aug 7, 2012 4:45 AM EDTA direct descendant of Brigham Young, Sue Emmett left the church because of the very values she says would make Romney a frightening president. She speaks exclusively with Jamie Reno.
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Sue Emmett is Mormon royalty. Her great-great-grandfather was Brigham Young, the founder of Salt Lake City, first governor of Utah, and president and prophet of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS) from 1847 until his death in 1877.
Clockwise from top left: A billboard advertising ex-Mormon support groups; a statue of Mormon pioneer leader Brigham Young in front of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints Temple in Salt Lake City; Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney; ex-Mormon Sue Emmett. (Getty Images; AP Photo)
Emmett, whose grandmother was born in Young's historic Beehive House, attended Brigham Young University, where she walked past the imposing 7-and-a-half-foot bronze-casted statue of her great-great-grandfather every day on her way to class.
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"Walking by that statue every day, I was reminded of my heritage, my lineage," says Emmett. "That, plus going up to Salt Lake and walking through the Beehive House a couple of times and thinking of my grandmother, who I knew very well, all that pretty much sealed the deal for me being a very devout, obedient Mormon girl."
But by the time she reached her mid-30s, she began to have doubts. Emmett started questioning the ethics and veracity of the church's doctrine and its founders, including Young himself, and she grew increasingly concerned with the way, she says, the church treats women. She held these questions close to the vest for many years until, in 1999, at the age of 55, she finally made the hard decision to leave the church.
"There was a powerful mystique around me that I was special because of my heritage, so it was really difficult for me to leave," says Emmett, now 71. "It was the only life, the only home I ever knew. But I just couldn't stay any longer."
Emmett, who still has dear friends and family members in the church"You can be critical of the church and still be compassionate toward the people in it," she saysis now president of the Exmormon Foundation, which was organized to give support and understanding to those who leave Mormonism. In an exclusive interview with The Daily Beast, Emmett, who rarely speaks to the media, talks about what life is like in the church, why she left, and what she thinks motivates Mitt Romney to want to be president.
Sue Emmett discusses her experience as a woman in the Mormon church.
"The church has astutely created a very benign image to the world. They spend millions of dollars a year doing this," says Emmett, who was born and raised in Portland, Ore., and still lives there. "But there are things that go on inside the church that are hurtful to women. There are many women still in the church who have complaints about not having any real say in what goes on, but they have nowhere to go with these complaints."
Emmett says there is a lot of silent suffering among Mormon women, but she just reached a point where she couldn't stay silent anymore.
- "The church has astutely created a very benign image to the world. They spend millions of dollars a year doing this," says Emmett.
"It was just a social and cultural thing," Emmett explains. "We made a vow that we would never have anything at the retreat that was anti-church, it would just be a place for cultural events and sharing ideas. We had artists and guest speakers, including one woman who spent her life traveling around the world taking pictures of women and their cultures."
Emmett says the retreat, which was held in an Oregon mountain lodge and typically attracted between 60 and 70 Mormon women, had feminist overtones, "but we never talked about problems at church. We did nothing wrong."
Still, the negative reaction among her church's leadership was the last straw.
"We knew we'd get in trouble for doing it, but we did it anyway," she says. "From that point on, I was marginalized. I'd done everything a good Mormon woman could do in the church, including teaching children in Sunday school, but after we did the retreat I was treated differently."
Responding to Emmett's comments about the church's treatment of women, Ruth Todd, a spokeswoman for the church, tells The Daily Beast: "Nearly half of the 14 million members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are women. To assert that my membership or participation in the church is based on compulsion or deception is both offensive and disparaging to me as a woman, and is patently false."
Says Todd: "The right of every individual [Mormon] to make choices for themselves that determine their path in life and in the eternities is a fundamental doctrine of our faith. As a woman, I view my role in the church and in God's plan as distinct and complementary to the efforts of men. Trying to characterize the role of women in the church in a purely hierarchical way misses the mark and is a flawed premise that demeans the role and value of women."
Since she left 13 years ago, Emmett has become a leader of the ex-Mormon movement, which she says is not about bashing her former church but about helping former members make the difficult adjustment. "It's such an insular world, and for some people it is really hard to make it on the 'outside,' so to speak," she says.
Emmett has watched Mitt Romney very closely throughout his public life and has strong opinions about what shaped his personality and his character. "Mitt is a product not only of his wealth, but of an organization that gives men power when they are 12 years old," she says. "That is when boys are ordained with the priesthood. It is a big moment in a Mormon male's childhood."
As for what pundits say is Romney's difficulty connecting with people, Emmett blames it largely on what she calls "the entitled Mormon male syndrome, where the leadership professes compassion and concern but leaves the manifestations of that to the drones. All male leadership is not this way; there are some wonderful men who do their best to exercise their power compassionately, but many do not."
Emmett says Romney was a bishop, "a position where everyone defers to you. What a bishop says goes. People come to them to receive blessings." He then became a stake president, she says, which means he presided over several congregations, and at that point bishops deferred to him.
"Mitt has had people defer to him and not challenge him his entire life," says Emmett. "In the Mormon church if you challenge your priesthood leaders it's a very bad thing to do, especially for women. As the world can now see, Mitt has a very hard time with being questioned and criticized; he's had so little of this in his life."
Will he be more beholden to his church than to the American people? Emmett recalls that when Romney was stake president in the church, he was pro-life. But when he was running for governor he changed his position to pro-choice. A woman in the church who was a good friend of Emmett's went to see Romney and thanked him for changing his position. "He told her that he had talked to church leaders in Salt Lake," Emmett says, "and that they gave him permission to change his position."
The Romney campaign did not respond to numerous requests for comment.
Emmett says she doesn't think Romney has the ability to separate what leaders of the church want from what the country needs.
"Mitt has been groomed to become president from a very young age," says Emmett. "The thing is, I think his father [George Romney, who ran for president in 1968] would have made a much better president. In many ways the church was more benign then than it is now."
Regarding Romney and the presidency, Emmett cites a bit of Mormon lore called the White Horse Prophecy that has floated around since the time of Mormon founder Joseph Smith. It suggests that Mormons believe a time will come when the U.S. Constitution is eroding and Mormon leaders will save it and usher in a new theocracy with Mormons in charge. Emmett's great-great-grandfather talked about it. In a discourse from 1855, Young wrote that "when the Constitution hangs, as it were, upon a single thread, they will have to call for the 'Mormon' Elders to save it from utter destruction; and they will step forth and do it."
Romney has said that he considers the White Horse Prophecy just a matter of speculation by church members. "I haven't heard my name associated with it or anything of that nature," he told The Salt Lake Tribune in 2007. "That's not official church doctrine…I don't put that at the heart of my religious belief."
But Emmett begs to differ. "I can guarantee you that there are millions of Mormons who believe this prophecy and see Romney as potential fulfillment of it," she says. "As a Mormon, you grow up hearing about this prophecy. I think Mitt believes he has a mandate from God to become president so he can help move this along. I don't know if it's a conscious thought, but it's in his subconscious."
Emmett says she thinks Romney's biggest fault is that he has a "serious problem telling the truth. There is flip-flopping, which he has done more than any politician in modern history, and then there is out and out lying," she says. "This kind of thing has sadly been a part of the church from the very beginning. Some modern apostles actually taught that it is not always the best thing to tell the truth if it interferes with preaching gospel."
Emmett says the notion of "Lying for the Lord," as it has been called, implies that teaching the whole truth about the church should be avoided. At a presentation on Lying for the Lord at the 2008 Exmormon Foundation conference, Ken Clark addressed the issue. Clark, who worked as a teacher for the LDS Church Education System (CES) for 27 years and also served as a bishop before leaving the church in 2003, tells The Daily Beast, "Lying has become an institutionalized method of administrative control with the church."
"Every Mormon grows up with the idea that it's OK to lie if it's for a higher cause," says Clark, who now works for a company that markets employment and labor market data. "But what happens is when this becomes a part of your ethical tool kit, you develop a condescending attitude toward people. Like Ann Romney saying 'you people.' This idea of lying for the Lord gives you license to place people on an inferior level. It's OK for Mitt Romney to ignore the principle of full disclosure because it's in his DNA. Look what he's doing with his taxes, and how he talks only in generic and sanitized terms about his religion."
But church spokeswoman Ruth Todd says there is no merit to Clark's accusations.
"To assert that there is a culture of dishonesty or deception in the church is both woefully uninformed and ridiculous," Todd says. "The pursuit of truth is at the heart of who we are. Mormon women around the world participate actively in our church because we find value and truth in the doctrines, structure and deep meaning provided by the gospel of Jesus Christ that is at the core of our faith. All church members are encouraged to study for themselves and develop their own convictions about the church and its teachings."
When Clark left the church, he says, Emmett was of "great help to me. She is one of best people I know. She is very courageous and compassionate."
And Emmett, despite her issues with Romney and the church, does not want to be cast as a Mormon hater. She says that while she strongly disagrees with many of the tenets and practices of Mormonism, most Mormons are kind, honest people.
"Many of my children and other family members are still devout Mormons, and I want to be sensitive to their beliefs and I have no desire to hurt them," says Emmett. "It's been hard for me. It was my entire life for 50 years. I was very sincere and devout for a very long time. But as a feminist and someone who believes that you should be allowed to say what you really feel, I had to leave."
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Jamie Reno, an award-winning correspondent for Newsweek for 17 years, has also written for The New York Times, Sports Illustrated, Rolling Stone, People, Men's Journal, ESPN, Los Angeles Times, TV Guide, MSNBC, Newsmax, Entertainment Weekly, and USA Today. Reno, who's won more than 85 writing awards, was the lead reporter on a Newsweek series on the 9/11 terrorist attacks that earned him and his colleagues the National Magazine Award for General Excellence, the highest award in magazine journalism. Reno, who's also an acclaimed author, singer-songwriter, and 15-year cancer survivor, lives in San Diego with his wife, Gabriela, and their daughter, Mandy.
For inquiries, please contact The Daily Beast at editorial@thedailybeast.com.
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Silence
7 days ago
What an absurd woman - she states she has never spoken with Mitt Romney - but purports to know what is in his subconscious mind. She's worthless as a source of information. Whoever is responsible for concocting this article should be ashamed of their muddled thinking.
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LondonInNY
13 days ago
The Mormon Church and its leadership can go to HELL. It is a patently false andfraudulent faith that preys on human souls.
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LondonInNY
13 days ago
The Mormon Church and its leadership can go to HELL. It is a patently false and fraudulent faith that preys on human souls.
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ManyQuestionsFewAnswers
Sep 13, 2012
When I was in high school one of our vice principals was also a Mormon bishop. He blatantly favored the Mormon kids over everyone else, regularly refusing to discipline bullies who were part of the church. He was one of the most pompous, entitled people I have ever met to this day. Some of the former students are now ex-Mormons and have plenty of stories about the dishonesty, misogyny and manipulation that goes on in the church. I think it speaks volumes that blacks couldn't be ordained in the church until it became too politically sensitive, then all of a sudden that long-standing doctrine was dropped, just like polygamy. When it became clear that Utah wouldn't be accepted as a state until multiple marriages were ended, suddenly polygamy was labeled as false doctrine and dumped. It's also theologically odd that, for a religion which puts so much faith in its founders' statements, the current sitting Prophet is permitted to freely contradict anything in prior Mormon doctrine without question. So the Mormon scriptures are God-given and inviolate... unless the Prophet says otherwise, then it's okay to believe or practice something different. We see that same level of wishy-washy "truthiness" in much of what Romney speaks: "This is absolutely what I believe... unless you tell me I should believe something else in order to get elected."
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suefergiebum
Sep 17, 2012
@ManyQuestionsFewAnswers - so the Mormon's he favored are now ex-Mormon's?
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suefergiebum
Sep 11, 2012
I totally disagree that the Mormon church does things to hurt women - although I do think this woman's feelings or her pride were hurt. I am a Mormon woman - not born in the Church - I joined the church in my late twenties. I married a Mormon and he was the sweetest guy who respected me way more than men who were NOT Mormon. I heard all sorts of trash talk against the Mormon's. I listened to it for a while - but what I heard and what I witnessed did not add up. Don't believe everything you hear. I think it is good to hear both sides - but to truly make an educated judgement don't just listen to scorned former members or people who have never set foot in the Mormon church. I have never felt so appreciated as a woman before I attended this church.
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JFarleg
Aug 31, 2012
The part about lying is especially correct. Some small percent of Mormons are truly good. A small percent are honest. The rest live in a world where deceit is the norm.
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hockkm
12 days ago
@JFarleg Like Harry Reid?
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Tammo
Aug 30, 2012
Fantastic article. Brave, precise, accurate. Excellent. I shall investigate the Exmormon Foundation and when I do, I fully expect to receive all of the information about it right up front. There will be no milk before the meat, of that I am sure. Kudos on this article.
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acberger1
Aug 29, 2012
This article is extremely poor, it ties a bunch of facts together in order to merely fit the author's own agenda. And that whole "retreat" thing seems extremely fishy, some sort of thing like that has nothing against church doctrine, why would mormon leaders assume there would be anti-mormon material and condemn it? It doesn't add up and shows theres more to the story than the article tells, and her assertions that Romney is a drone who simply commands and expects people to follow is ridiculous, her portrayal of church structure is exceedingly biased and un-realistic. Not to mention the plethora of blatant generalizations towards mormon men, the structure of the church and Romney himself, and she attempts to cover these by saying she still does like some Mormon men and believes they work to be compassionate and open-minded. Which on a side note, if she says this, how on earth can she profile Romney, a man she has never known or seen operate within the churhc, as a command giving drone? And Romney worked as a governor for numerous years, this isn't some dictatorial position, it requires working with numerous other people and following guidance. This article is simply a basis for a woman to condemn a Candidate merely because of his religious affiliation, which is absolutely ridiculous. Its a pity her generalized and ignorant condescension towards Romney is given weight merely because she is related to a prominent mormon figure.
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Sirk
Sep 6, 2012
@acberger1 You have no idea about some religions. My in-laws belonged to a Church of Christ, and the entire congregation went ballistic when a few women were the only people to show up at one of their Wednesday night prayer meetings (or whatever they call them), which naturally meant one of the women had to lead the group in prayer. You would have thought the world was coming to an end - because a WOMAN led a prayer group!!!
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lynnea1
4 days ago
@Sirk @acberger1 The Church of Christ is a breakaway of the Mormon Church. It used to be called the Reorganized Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.Many times, things such as what you mention come from a group or a clique within their own congregation. When they think things are going to go a certain way and they dont then sometimes people get their panties bunched up in a wad. That happens everywhere, not just in your in-laws church. :)
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timelapse11
Aug 23, 2012
Wow. Where to even begin here. First of all, the author of the article seems to have had life experiences growing up that I do not envy. I imagine that she felt so much pressure to be the perfect mormon, just because you were related to B.Y. I imagine that people who knew you were related to him pretended to be your friend, lied to you, used you just because were considered "church royalty". I imagine that when it came time for you to choose a college, you were expected to choose BYU. Even though you probably wanted to go somewhere where people hadn't even heard of B.Y. I imagine that you're entire youth the one thing you wanted was independence, and freedom just to figure out things for yourself. I don't know you at all, but I can imagine....
My experience with the church has been much different. I am 20 years old and was born i the church. I have never heard of the "white horse prohpecy", and since most mormons aren't actually US citizens i would guess that "millions" haven't heard about it, however I do know there have been incidents where the US Government has counted on the church's humanitarian aid forces when natural disasters hit in various areas, and if that is a real prophecy i'd assume that's what it refers to. But idk. Seriously.
In the church i have often found myself in leadership roles and can honestly say I have never felt powerless, or like my words and opinion didn't matter because i am a girl. I have always been encouraged to question things, think logically (like SPOC!). I can also say I have never felt pressured to lie in the church. I have not yet needed to go to the bishop to resolve any serious matters like addictions, but I have had a number of temple interviews. The questions aren't to find out if you KNOW that Joe. Smith was a prophet or if you KNOW that there is a God etc. but more to find out if you believe and hope that these things are true even though you don't know for a fact or beyond a shadow of a doubt. The interviews are designed to help you in your search to find truth whereever you are in that quest. If you're doing your best to live by the commandments and become a better person everyday and you believe and hope that jesus christ is your savior, you will be found worthy to go to the temple. End of Story.
On Mitt Romney: I will be very general here, I think Romney, i like many of us people (not just mormons) sees a country that is hurting. Now, I think that everyone can agree that Mitt Romney is good at managing his wealth. It doesn't matter if you think he is evil because of his money or if you think he's a "good steward" because if it, you pretty much have to agree that he is good at making money and right now our country could use someone who is good at making money and getting rid of debt. Obama has been really good at spending money and has been really bad at spending money well.
I'll end by saying, I do believe the church is true, by which I mean I believe it is an actual restoration of the church that Jesus Christ established when he lived on the Earth. I believe that Christ is the son of God. I believe that the Sacrifice of Christ makes it possible for me to be forgiven of my misdeeds and I also believe that His complete Atonement for mankind makes it possible for all people to be resurrected after they die - not like zombies. I believe that because this church has the real priesthood authority (that "power" the 12 year old boys get) that ordinances can be performed on earth that will last for eternity. I know that when I read from the scriptures frequently, and take time to pray to my father in heaven, that my life is happier, and have more gratitude for all that I have, and I am better equipped to deal with the stressful curve balls that life can throw at us.That's all i have to say.
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JFarleg
Aug 31, 2012
@timelapse11 Never heard of the "white horse prohpecy (sic)"? Mormons have been hot and bothered about getting into the presidency since just about just about the inception of the religion. The CoJcOLDS founder Joseph Smith for president in 1844 on a platform of "theodemocracy". Much more recently, there's been a steady stream of mormon candidates (George Romney (1968); Mo Udall (1976); Orrin Hatch (2000), Jon Huntsman and Willard M. Romney) desperate to fulfill #1 BoMo's "White Horse Prophecy".You'll hear Mormons use the phrase "the Constitution hanging by a thread". (Glenn Beck and Orrin Hatch have both used it.) This is from the profit himself... http://www.salon.com/2012/01/29/mitt_and_the_white_horse_prophecy/http ://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Horse_Prophecy
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hockkm
12 days ago
@JFarleg @timelapse11 Ridiculous! And learn how to spell..."profit"??? You mean prophet. And I am not Mormon. Furthermore, I say, so what? This is all so reminiscent of JFK and the threat of a Catholic theocracy. Ridiculous!
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lynnea1
4 days ago
@JFarleg @timelapse11 Nope. Me Neither. I dont know a single Mormon who lives from that time, who could straighten it out for us. We dont continue to live in the 1800s either, contrary to popular beliefs. Joseph Smith was the Prophet and Founder of our faith; he was, however, human and not perfect. He tried government and politics, but it was not to be. The same thing applies here. Mitt will win if it was meant to be. The girl who made this post pretty well summed it up. Funy you didnt include Harry Reid on the list of Mormon politicians, I wonder why that is! Id bet there has also been a steady stream of Christians of other faiths aspiring to be President, as well! So what? And salon.com is a really substantial place to get info on Mormon doctrine---NOT! The Prophet (not Profit-that's what Mitt wants our country to do) does not aspire to have anything he says in a rag such as that. So you come on here to spew hatred. Why dont you just go ahead and say you hate Mormons?! You cant replace the word 'Mormons'// in that sentence and get away with saying, blacks, hispanics, Jews, gays, etc., in place of it but you'll sure be politically correct to say you hate Mormons! When you say the things you've said, you're just preaching to your own choir. You're not going to change a single mind either way about the Mormon faith, or Mitt Romney, for that matter. You're just trying to look smart, and that just aint happenin!
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Logicality
5 days ago
@timelapse11 The author of this article wasn't Emmett herself, for one thing.
This *rebellious* trait you're projecting onto Emmett, I assume as a prevalent reason behind her accusations, is rather implicating and inaccurate. She's stated that her questioning/doubts began in her 30's. What would she or anyone gain from her being "church royalty", as you blatantly put it, it's not like she has some kind of influence or power that people could take advantage of. I imagine it's pretty easy to put the blame on victimization when someone is troubled by the church. But maybe she did have a sort of pressure in her younger years due to her ancestry, but it's anything but the sole reason behind her choices.
I too was born into this church, but no longer believe in its teachings (or any religion); this was due more to my questioning of doctrine, teachings, and the strange, vindictive, racist, sexist, inconsistency and capriciousness (etc, etc...) of God, more than any kind of outside pressure.
And this "white horse prophecy" of course isn't publicly taught as doctrine, but there are obvious implications that relate to it. The 2nd coming of Jesus is supposed to happen around a time of great turmoil and conflict, and who wouldn't suspect that his "one true church" would be the one that gains influence and/or power over the masses. And the USA has been referred to as (one of) the most powerful nations, so of course a Mormon presidential candidate is a big deal to the 6+ million Mormons that do live in the US, even if it's not exactly something vocally focused on. The second millennium is here, of which has been suspected by many to be a *rough* estimate of his return. And people also tend to exaggerate situations in the world, like hurricanes or earthquakes (or Mormon presidents?) as possible acts of God, or as correlations of biblical/Mormon prophecy.
I can see too well the negativity and doubt that arose in Emmett's view on the Church's questionably-sexist placement of the Priesthood and official leadership roles on only men (and until recently not even black men). And the non-spoken given that the church leaders like bishops and such will know what's right and cannot be questioned, because to do so would be like practically questioning God to his face, what with their *influence* from God. And in case it isn't already obvious, prevalent roles like being a bishop or a Prophet are restricted to men, because of the gender-specific Priesthood. No wonder some women have enough of a mind and conscience to question the principles of this religion and supposedly God himself.
As for faith, or to have belief and hope as you put it. How does one believe that which one does not know? It's self-chosen ignorance. This is NOT something that should decide the ultimate destination of our eternal souls on. And praying to know if it's true? Look up placebo effect.
I do believe that this religion gives you, and its other members, a sense of well-being and happiness. But I believe this to derive more from the fact it gives your lives a purpose, and to follow the standards and teachings of this religion helps you to feel accomplished since you're working towards this purpose. Plus, that feeling that a supernatural deity is watching out for you can make anyone feel more likely to succeed.
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Logicality
5 days ago
@timelapse11 Oh and one thing I forgot to mention. A lot of Emmett's criticism towards Romney relates to the fact he's been in leadership positions in the church, as well as political. And the vast differences of the needs and voices of those you're leading between the two separate fields may end up clashing with each other. Or in other words, he might just subconsciously react to events in a way that doesn't exactly fit the needs of the American people, but to those that the church views as "right" as well as how well he may take criticisms and objections to his choices if he is President.
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